Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
