Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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