I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
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