If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
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