Whod you bang
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Randomize
