Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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