I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
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