just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Randomize
