So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Your penis caused this!
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
