It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
