If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize