if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Randomize
