when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.