Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
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