i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Randomize
