Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
