I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
