# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
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