I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
worst night to have a conscience
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize