i'm lost and i look like a hooker
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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