she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
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