READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Randomize