He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
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