Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
