beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
