Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
then he tried to convert me to islam
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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