I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Randomize
