I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize