There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
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