I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
