I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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