New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
