I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
