he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
