yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
