Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
you never un-have a 4some
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
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