those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
