LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
this is an emotional support booty call
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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