i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize