I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
