we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
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You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
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Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
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