ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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