thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Randomize