These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
