I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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