you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
