If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
