you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Randomize
