she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
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