I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
